I Will Hope in Him!

After much thought, I have decided to put this post back up. As a lot of you know, I suffered a miscarriage back in April. It was due to an ectopic pregnancy. Needless to say, Joseph and I were devastated. We weren't planning on having a baby, so it was the shock of our lives. It was an even greater shock when we lost our precious child. However, by the grace of God, we learned to accept His decision. We know that we are in His hands and He takes care of his own. He grants comfort when it is needed. There is one verse that has given me much comfort throughout this whole ordeal.

I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss. Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this: The faithful love of the Lord never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is His faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning. I say to myself, "The Lord is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in Him! ~Lamentations 3:20-24

I have debated on whether or not I would share my journey on here, but I decided it would be very therapeutic for me to share my story. I know that it is a great comfort for me to read stories of others who struggle through the same thing and I hope that my struggle will help somebody else. Joseph and I are about to begin the long journey of IVF. We went yesterday for our first consultation. We are having to go this route because I had an ovary removed about 8 years ago, due to an ovarian cyst. Then with our miscarriage, my remaining tube had to be removed as well. So needless to say, the plumbing isn't all connected correctly! So bring on the shots and pills and needles! We aren't completely in the stage of our lives where we are ready for children 100%, but due to my proneness to cysts and scar tissue/damage to my remaining ovary, we don't really have an option as to picking the absolute perfect timing. And that is fine because I have put my faith in the Lord and know that He will not fail us.

I go back to the doctor tomorrow to really begin the process. I have no real idea of what to expect, so it is a little scary. But I will try to post everything as it happens, so others who are about to go down this path for the first time can see what it is all about first hand. To begin with, they will monitor my cycle for a few months, and run some tests on Joseph and me just to make sure everything is a-ok. If all goes as planned, we should be ready for egg retrieval and implantation at the end of November. I knew that the Lord was guiding us in our decision when the doctor told us when we should expect a positive pregnancy test. When she told us that we could take a test around Christmas I just lost it because that would have been the due date of our child. So instead of Christmas being a somewhat sad day for me, it should *hopefully* be a day of joy and celebration. So I should have an entry tomorrow with all the gory details of my first visit!! So pray for us as we begin this long process. We are gonna need it!